# Metacognitive musings

It feels like ages since I last posted here, though a month ago is short in the time frame of great minds, who endeavor on projects for years and even decades. Since then, much has passed through my mind philosophically and meta-cognitively that I have not kept record of out of a belief in their triviality and lack of detail as well as the lack of natural inclination to write them out, compared to before. Though I share my thoughts with close friends through private (or not so, as nothing is private nowadays, electronically) channels, my past month has been loaded more on the intake end as far as text is concerned, with much of it being in Russian, and to my great pleasure, I now converse in it regularly with a number of people non-orally, including a charming, talented girl who won a worldwide chess championship for those under a specified age group.

Now to propagate my bull shit mental signals to eternity. I recall in some math circle, the motto was “existence is a state of mind.” I identify with this quite deeply. One cognitively mature to a sufficient degree can appreciate that what one experiences consciously, the extent to which it can be precisely characterized in qualitative terms, is a function of brain structure. Steve Hsu has proposed on his blog a toy model where there are $n$ genes, each with some (finite) number of variants. This can be represented as a (bounded) lattice on an $n$-dimensional space, on which some metric can be defined, that correlates with reasonable metrics for outward behavior and cognitive manifestations. This space has been far from exhausted by all organisms which have lived on this planet. In particular, the theoretical extreme relative to the realized one is almost certainly Mount Everest relative to molehills which occur at several orders of magnitude higher of frequency. To go back to the motto, we must clarify that the “existence” here by the very context in which it resides is what can be perceived mentally by the human brain, which is very likely a minuscule subset of the theoretical maximum of biological perception of the world.

Growing up is a process of realizing successively how broken one’s former brain was. Eventually, provided that one is above some threshold in IQ, it will dawn on one that there are people capable to perceiving the world much more clearly and correctly than you can, and that there is a much higher world that one is incapable of experiencing. One sees the great extent to which what one becomes is determined at conception.

Different people think very differently, much of it owing to nature. People have different upbringings, which accounts for much of the variance in what one is exposed to, but when one is an adult and settles independently, one is more able to choose what to expose oneself in a free manner, free of cultural constraints, especially with the near ubiquitous access to information nowadays. To illustrate, a good example would be the countless I’ve seen go from evangelical to atheist and the reverse. This is especially so, in my opinion, for those higher on the bell curve, who are harder to control mentally.

I myself am a materialist, as is obvious from the thesis of this post. God to me is Mother Nature. I will not say I am an atheist as such cannot be definitely proven or witnessed before afterlife but I will shy away perhaps with partiality in the other direction. It is a misfortune maybe that God has produced me to be incapable of being penetrated by him and I have wondered what it would feel like to be the complement of what I am, though such is of course futile assuming non-existence of brain transplants. On this note, religiosity is, according to my reading online, rather heritable (surprise surprise), and it has occurred to me that perhaps those of East Asian descent due to a divergent branch of evolution are less prone to religiosity, especially with my seeing that Japan, in addition to the heathen middle kingdom, now directed by a Marxist-Leninist (or maybe only in name) party, is also high in its degree of secularity. The aggression within missionary men has both amazed and perplexed me. What is it, after all, that enables the conviction that those conquered, enslaved, culturally teared apart, are in fact being saved in the name of God or to be less extreme that there is such a holy duty to proliferate this conception of the human mind, a product of God itself, (or not) that fuels such intrusive and unceasing behavior, often targeted towards the young, impressionable, and often impoverished? I do not see behavior anywhere near in degree of magnitude exhibited within those on the reverse end of the religious/ideological spectrum, as an expected value. One’s religious faith, as far as I see, ought to be a private affair that is respected regardless of differences, barring cases of excessive and grotesque infringement. Moreover, the Christian culture, the Abrahamic tradition, is one I seek to know more about on a factual basis, as it is an integral and indispensable part of the Western culture that is dominant globally today owing to the exponential leap in penetration of thought and sophistication of production sprung forth by an explosive awakening of the slumbered Greek and Roman, tearing fetters and opening grand vistas the last half millennium.

How to see heaven and earth in the eyes of a demigod? How to transcend mankind? How to control the own evolution of man? The very essence of our existence, the cognitive of it, to be unveiled the years soon to come!